Message by Pastor Kunle Osunkunle
Bible Text: Genesis 2:18-25.
God created a man and a woman giving them individual specific roles.
Women are made to be helpers while men are made to be workers.
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| DON'T FIGHT |
When God gives you an assignment, He will give you the anointing and
ability to fulfill it. If He has called you to be a man or a woman with
particular roles, He will give you all that you need to fulfill the
roles.
God has a purpose for the man which is different from His purpose for
the woman. His plan is as such that when both come together in
marriage, it is with an aim to fulfill a divine mandate.
If you are in a relationship and you can't appreciate the differences
between a man and a woman, you can't enjoy the benefits therein.
According to 1 Peter 3:7, women need to be understood. When a woman
says she is not heard, it implies that the man needs to give more
attention to hearing her. Understanding in this sense means, "To be
under the opinion or stance of someone (in this case, your partner)."
Marriage is not a place for competition because both partners are in
the same team aiming at the same goal while the devil is the opposition
team. Both of you need to work and labour together to achieve a
successful relationship.
"That a woman is a weaker vessel" as quoted in the above-mentioned
Scriptures means, "she is very fragile and expensive like porcelain."
Therefore, you must treat her with so much care and love.
The way a man thinks and processes information is quite different
from the way a woman thinks and processes information. You need to
understand the way your spouse thinks and processes information. Lack of
this understanding will affect every aspect of your relationship.
Can you imagine if all the people in the world are just men or just
women? We will live in a very boring and lifeless world. Both men and
women are needed in the world and one is not an advantage over the other
as they both have their individual and unique roles to play in order to
fulfill God's plan.
As a result, in a relationship the opinion of both partners are
equally very important. Get to know, understand and appreciate your
differences so that you may grow and have a successful and fruitful
relationship. Proverbs 24:3-5.
DIFFERENCE 1:
WOMEN ARE RELATIONSHIP-ORIENTED WHILE MEN ARE WORK-ORIENTED:-
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| BOXING RING |
1. Naturally, a man will always see fulfilment in his work, winning a
competition and just conquering. He has a conquer mentality. He wants
to be in charge and prove his abilities. So, he likes competitions; that
is why many men like games like football, boxing and other highly
competitive games that steer up their passion.
On the other hand, women are not as such because relationship is not
developed in the boxing ring or on the football field/pitch. They are
relationship-oriented. The reason most women have more friends than most
men and they trust easily than men.
2. A woman gets her identity from the relationships she builds. A man
gets his sense of accomplishment and identity in his work. As a result,
women are very emotional while men are very logical always wanting to
reason out all things.
3. Women are more regular in Church attendance than men and they are
often open-hearted. They love to always discuss in details including
their daily endeavours. They always expect men to say more than a few
words like "it is good", "it is well", "okay", "fine", etc.
Men speak an average of about 11,000 words a day while women speak about double of these words a day.
A woman wants her spouse to give her attention when she talks. Listen
to her and be interested in her discussion both in the private and in
the public.
4. Women tend to work harder to keep their relationship and please
their spouse than men. While men on the other hand take their
relationship to be a project because they are work-oriented.
5. The relational part of a woman makes her always love to practice
hugging people. She loves to hear fondle words softly spoken like "I
love you", "I miss you", "I like the way you handle our children", "I
love the meal", etc. But, a man wants to hear things that pertain to his
achievements in his work, conquest and exploit or ego.
6. When a man loses his job, it is usually traumatic for him and his
relationship. At times, such gets him to do crazy things and behave
foolishly if not properly handled. To him, loss of his job makes him
lose his rightness and identity and he feels like a failure (that he
can't provide and protect his family or relationship).
This is because, his mentality is that he is working to protect and
provide for his family. But, for a woman, her mentality is that she
wants him.
7. Men tend to be prideful because they are success-oriented. Women
want their spouses to give them most attention because they are
relationship-oriented.
8. Women always want to talk to their spouses. You need to give her
most attention not the football you are watching or the work you are
doing. When you do she will possibly join you in watching or in working.
This suggests that if there is anything your spouse is interested in
doing, get interested in it. It could be shopping, football, movies,
sleeping, traveling, etc.
9. Because of man's orientation, the way he thinks about intimacy in
relationship is by having sex. Genesis 34. But a woman's affection is
usually moved by words not really sex. So, when you meet a woman for the
first time, talk with her and get to know her. Don't act hastily asking
for her phone number or BB pin. By so doing you are short-circuiting
the necessary discussion that should begin every relationship.
10. Women move to nurture relationships while men move to achieve their works.
11. While a man wants his spouse to give attention to his work,
ambitions, visions, goals, pursuits and opinions both in the private and
in the public; a woman wants her spouse to give attention to her when
she is talking and discussing both in the private and in the public.
When you are in courtship, don't get busy sleeping with each other,
engage in quality discussions and get to know more about each other
doing proper evaluations. Otherwise, the man will face his work after
you are married.
...TO BE CONTINUED ON MONDAY, MAY 21, 2012.
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Some people have difficulty in getting married; the reason for this message, to help identify where you got it wrong and teach you what to do to make it happen.
