TRUST (PART 1)

Pastor Kunle Osunkunle

(President, The Singles Fellowship, The Fountain of Life Church)

Text: Psalms 125:1 (MSG)

Mount Zion is a mountain that is immovable. Regardless the circumstance, situation or challenge, it always remains. Those who put their trust in God are like this Mount Zion. In spite of the storms of life, they cannot be moved. So, at every point in time, we can trust in God because we know His character that He can never fail.

The truth is, when you trust God based on His word that He cannot change and He can never let you down; then you will see Him do exactly what He says He will do.

TRUST

When you go into a marital relationship or get married to someone, you probably expect that you should trust one another.  When you take the marriage vow, you say that it’s for better or worse; it simply implies that you are looking onto your spouse alone and that you will no longer focus on any other man or woman. So, you are not expecting infidelity from him or her.

There is no one that wants to marry someone who he or she cannot trust. The next closest relationship you will ever get to after your relation with God is the marriage relationship. As it is that you go into a covenant relationship with God at the time of salvation, the same way you establish a covenant relationship with your spouse when you marry him or her. And it is almost impossible to go into a covenant with someone you don’t trust.

Trust is a fundamental ingredient of any human relationship.  When you don’t trust your intended partner, there are certain issues that will ensue which will become suggestions towards distrust in your relationship. There are things you do while dating or in courtship with your intended partner that may result into distrust in marriage. For instance, premarital sex is a recipe for distrust in later years.

 Trust is one of the most important ingredients for a successful relationship. It is like salt; it gives your relationship the needed seasoning. Without trust it is almost impossible for a marriage to work. Don’t marry someone you trust 99.9% because the devil can work or wreck havoc with just 0.1%. Once he begins to work with 0.1% it becomes magnified. When you trust someone, you feel safe, feel connected and get closer. The closer you get to someone, the more trust you expect from him or her.

When you give trust to someone who doesn’t deserve it you actually give him or her power to destroy you. When you give your commitment to marry someone, you expect to feel safe with him or her. When you are in a relationship, you need to find out if you can trust your intended spouse or not. That is why courtship is a time for interview, to evaluate with focus and not a time for intercourse. When you start to sleep with the person, the discovery process stops. You don’t know whether you can trust him or her any more.

Many people are heart-broken because they didn’t discover if their intended spouse can be trusted before they gave out their heart to him or her. Before you give your heart to someone else, prove him trustworthy because your heart is very delicate. You cannot afford to give it to unproven person.

Trust is not what you get it is earned. Test all spirit. By the things he or she says, acts or think you can know whether he or she can be trusted. Trust is a living entity, breathing constantly in order for a relationship to survive. Trust has to be something you invest in on a daily basis.

WHAT IS TRUST?

1. Trust is putting confidence in someone that he or she will be honest to you at all times; being faithful, being loyal, being sincere and being dependable hoping that he or she will always tell you the truth (even in little things). This will result when you can be truthful to one another at all times. Someone who is truthful about his or her feelings when you are together can be trusted.  When you see someone who is truthful to himself or herself can be trusted. It implies that such can be loyal, faithful, constant and dependable at all times.

2. If someone can gossip about other people to you, he or she can gossip to others about you. Someone who is committed to his or her words can be trusted. Can he or she keep his or her promises? Someone who cannot keep his or her promises before marriage cannot keep marriage promises because marriage has gotten so many promises. Marriage is not only about the good times. Will he or she stay when bad times come? If you are in a relationship and you don’t have peace, you have to check it again.

3. Trust is not an emotion that you should give to someone based on what or how you feel. Emotions are not stable and you cannot base your decisions on what is unstable. No one gives trust, it must be earned. 1 Corinthians 4:2. For anyone to be trusted, he or she must prove himself or herself and earn it.

The way we have defined trust as putting confidence, being faithful, being loyal being dependable, you need to ask yourself sincerely; do you think someone is capable of doing all these all the time? Human nature is not capable, that is why we need to understand our limitations. Jeremiah 17:7. In your own strength, you cannot trust someone. Psalms 118:8; Micah 7:5 (NLT); John 2:23-25.

Marriage is committing your heart into another person’s hands. So, don’t give your heart to someone who has not earned your trust otherwise, you can be heart-broken.  There are some people who have died as a result of emotional break-down while some ran mad because they committed their lives into people’s hand that they don’t trust.

There are two reasons why you don’t trust people, namely:

1.       Because you know them. There are some people you know based on your experiences with them that they are not trustworthy. So, experience is important when it comes to the issue of trust. The reason for experience is because of the environment has a way it affects us. Where we grow up has a way of affecting us and determines how we trust people. Likewise, the way we have seen life affects whether we trust or not. There are certain people who have bad past and serious past hurts that have concluded that certain gender cannot be trusted or things should be hidden from certain gender.

2.       Because you don’t know them. Someone you are meeting for the first time is a stranger and you don’t know the person. So, it takes time to discover if someone is trustworthy or not.

Trust is a risk that makes you vulnerable because you put your heart in the hands of someone else. But, there is a wise way you can take the risk. We go through certain things in life that will make us ordinarily not to trust people.

HOW TO TRUST PEOPLE

1.    THROUGH THE WORD OF GOD: - To trust someone, you need to study the word of God diligently. Start to view or see people through the word of God. Some people have had bad experiences that only the word of God can heal them. Colossians 2:8. Regardless the terrible things you have gone through in life, you need to start to renew your life with the word of God. When you come to Christ, there is healing – intellectual, emotional and spiritual healing. The more you read the word of God, the more you see things in the proper perspective.

2.       INVESTIGATE INTO HIS/HER HEART: - The way your intended spouse’s heart is, that is the way he or she will treat your heart. What you don’t have you cannot give. If his or her heart is corrupt, he or she will corrupt yours. It is difficult to trust another man. So, when it comes to the issue of trust, the heart is to be considered. When you need to know whether to trust someone, investigate his or her heart. Remember, courtship is a time to interview and discover your intended spouse through thorough evaluations. Once you start to sleep together, you stop the discovery process and in the future you cannot trust the person.

3.        LOOK FOR GOD IN PEOPLE: - There is no one who is capable of being trustworthy. No one can be really trusted. But, a man or woman who commits to God is the one who can be trusted. Deep calls unto deep while shallowness calls unto shallowness. You can only marry at your level. When you take the decision to marry someone. It is based on the level of your spirituality at the time. Look for someone who is very devoted and committed to God. Devotion comes before duty. The man or woman who trusts God is the same who can be trusted. Even in marriage, there should be a constant devotion to God in the study of the word and prayers. The issue of mind renewal is constant. So, don’t take it for granted if your spouse stops reading the Bible. When you are dating, how does he or she handle the things of God? The way your spouse views or sees the things of God will determine how he or she will relate to you. If he or she doesn’t take the things of God serious, he or she may disappoint you.

4.       DOES HE OR SHE LOVES GOD: - Faith works by love. Galatians 6:5. So, you need to ask whether he or she love God. The person that loves God can be trusted. The person who loves God will abstain from sin and will never cut corners.

The Lord will help you and cause your life to glorify Him in Jesus’ name.

Share this

THE CONFIDENT SINGLES